Yesterday I went to Rock & Shock. I am not sure how to describe it, but it is geared towards horror fans. It consists of vendors with goods to sell, celebrity guests signing autographs, plus panels and discussions. I went with Shalisha and Corey – probably my only friends who watch horror movies.
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*Note: I can thank my mom for my love of horror movies AND my imperviousness to being scared. And probably a few neuroses.
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I had so much fun!
First of all, when we walked in there was a huge booth dedicated to Troma merchandise. Hallelujah, Redneck Zombies!!
It was so exciting that I found myself acting oddly cheerful. For example, I saw a 3 3/4″ figurine and started squealing, “Look at the tiny Leatherface! Look at him! Who’s the tiny Leatherface, who is?” – as if I was talking to a toddler.
And not 5 minutes later, I beckoned to Corey to come look at the Extreme Horror booth’s featured movie “Fetus” and exclaimed, “Look! It was banned in Germany! You know how much you love movies banned in Germany!”
We were told Germans don’t take kindly to movies featuring decapitated fetuses.
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Other items seen at vendor booths:
a birdeater tarantula (fuck no)
legless lizards (why is that not just called a snake? no idea)
tiny zombie gnomes (hell yes, I got one)
a giant tortoise (I don’t get it either)
a vintage figure of the Zuni fetish doll from “Trilogy of Terror” (and all I could do was keep screaming, “it’s life sized! it’s life sized!”)
He may be small but he will ruin your night.
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The highlight for me was getting autographs!
The first one we got was Laurence Harvey – he of Human Centipede 2. One of the most graphically disturbing movies I’ve ever seen. It makes the first Human Centipede look like a Disney movie. (I said that to Laurence Harvey and he looked at me and said, “Oh yes”. Creepy? Oh, yes.) Shalisha almost cried because he scared her so much. She took my picture with him, and, unbeknownst to me, he whipped out a stapler for the photo (see the movie to get the significance – if you dare). This caused Shalisha to shake in fright and all the pics to be slightly blurry.
He was very nice, however. At least, I think he was. Here’s how he signed my movie:
“I’ll be thinking of you (with barbed wire in my hand!)” – CREEPY
The heart was a nice touch, tho.
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I was the most tongue tied when I spoke with David Naughton. This is most likely because I kept vaguely insulting him.
I love David Naughton – of “American Werewolf in London“, Dr. Pepper commercials, and a hardly watched 70’s TV show called “Makin’ It”. In an attempt to express this love, I started off with, “I know I don’t look this old, but I watched your TV show Makin It.” This old. He gently said, “I don’t look that old to have made that show.” Me: “No, YOU DON’T.” Shalisha told him I made her watch the video of him singing the theme song (of the same name) so then I said, “You were a Renaissance man!” (were? were??) “You ARE one. You are one NOW.”
Jesus. Just shoot me now.
David Naughton, if you read this, I AM SO SORRY.
David Naughton – very nice, and talented, and willing to pose with a douchebag
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I was equally as excited to meet Danny Trejo! Who is so cute you could put him in your pocket! Until Shalisha reminded me he might cut me.
He was very gracious. He even insisted we get a group photo! And I would not budge one inch from him when we did it. I was gonna have me some Danny action.
looks nice, kicks ass
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The last autograph I got was….are you ready?… ANTHONY MICHAEL HALL.
YES. IT WAS.
Holy hell. I was not prepared for him to seem so…. tall. And soft spoken. And genuine.
Seriously, his handshake was friendly. His eye contact was unwavering. Sincere.
Perhaps this is why, after he shook my hand and sat down, I blurted “I love you!”. And I did it in a tone that said, “let’s just get this out in the open…I love you”. He smiled graciously.
But. I. Kept. Going.
Because. Because I remembered how he was the iconic geek boy and then one day – BAM! – he was not. I think it was when I saw “Edward Scissorhands” that I first noticed AMH had filled out. In a good way.
So, I said, “you know, as you got older, you got better and better looking”.
He replied, “that’s very nice of you to say”. I insisted that I could not possibly be the only person who said this to him, but he still thanked me as if it was the first time he’d ever heard it. Maybe it was. I don’t know. I cannot even think because I was talking to ANTHONY MICHAEL HALL.
And you guys? His eyes are the most incredible blue. Like, I may have visited heaven when I looked into them.
What’s important here is that ANTHONY MICHAEL HALL IS TOUCHING ME.
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All in all, I’d say it was a great day! Can’t wait until next year!
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Quirk can kiss my dimpled white ass
Seriously. I find dealership service centers to be immoral on a good day. At times, criminal even. Below is the letter I fired off to GM, the Better Business Bureau, and the dealership itself. This reminds me of the Best Buy clusterfuck… dear lord, I am so exhausted.
To Whom It May Concern:
I am writing to express my dissatisfaction with the service provided to my Saturn vehicle by GM/Chevrolet. This service, or lack thereof, has cost me money and threatens my safety and well-being, as I am not currently driving a safe vehicle.
Here is what happened:
1) In June 2009, I purchased a 2008 Saturn Astra. The vehicle was brand new with 14 miles on it.
2) In 2011, my horn stopped working. On July 29, 2011 I brought my car to Quirk Chevrolet in Manchester, NH – the local GM branch that was servicing Saturn vehicles. They informed me that there was a technical service bulletin for this vehicle, and “fixed” the horn free of charge. According to the invoice, the bulletin doc id# was 2551417. (I have not yet been able to locate this bulletin id or its description anywhere online.)
3) Despite the “service” I received, I continued to periodically have issues with the horn, as well as the radio controls located on the steering wheel. I was reluctant to bring it back to Quirk because, when I called to ask about the problem, I was told that I would be charged a diagnostic fee until they could determine if it was the “exact same issue” I had before. Quirk’s diagnostic fee is $95 – a price I could not afford to take a chance on.
4) I noticed that, when the horn did not work, it correlated with the radio volume control on the steering wheel (right hand side) not working. If I tried to raise the volume and could not, I immediately knew the horn was not functioning.
5) At the start of this year, the horn (and volume control) ceased to work at all. I knew I could not put it off any longer. (Unfortunately, my mechanic was unable to do the work. He indicated that he thought it was a problem with the transmission between the horn signal and the modem of my vehicle. An idea that Quirk NEVER brought up, btw.) I went back to Quirk.
6) On March 8, 2014, I went to Quirk’s service center. I explained the situation, including the detail that when the volume control did not work, neither did the horn. I paid a $95 diagnostic fee, and they looked at my car for over 3 hours. I was told by my liaison, Fred, that I needed a switch in my steering wheel. I then paid another $54.98 for the “switch”. I had to wait for the part to arrive, so it was not until March 22, 2014 that my car was “fixed”. On that day, I paid another $66.50 for labor. Total cost to me was $216.48.
7) The very next day (Sunday), I drove to the grocery store. I tried to raise the volume on the radio and it did not work. Neither did my horn. I called Quirk the following Monday and was told to bring it back.
8) I brought it back in on March 28, 2014 and that is when I discovered, from talking with Fred, that the “switch” they replaced was for the radio control only. They did not do any repair to fix the horn because the horn worked when they looked at it. Fred also tried to charge me another $95 to look at my car again. I told him that I was not paying that amount because they obviously had not fixed the problem that I originally brought my car in there for. Quirk was unable to do anything at this time because, once again, the horn was working.
9) On April 22, 2014, my horn was not working (again). I immediately drove it to Quirk. Unfortunately, it started working on the way there. Once again, they could do nothing. But I was told that they would research service bulletins, etc. I am not sure why they did not do this from the beginning. I told them this was important, as it is a safety hazard. I have no idea when my horn will or won’t work!
10) I still have not heard from Fred or anyone else at Quirk.
At this point, I am very upset. I paid over $200 to have a “switch” replaced that I probably did not need. I say that because the radio control STILL does not periodically work. THE SAME EXACT PROBLEMS WITH THE HORN AND THE RADIO STILL EXIST.
The horn in my vehicle still periodically does not work. And I do not have time to drive to Quirk every time it happens. I have a job. Where I need to make money to pay for repairs I don’t need, evidently.
I am extremely disappointed with the fact that Quirk is unable to help me and seems unwilling to help. I am upset that my safety is at risk because Quirk was too lazy to look up technical service bulletins (I recently found one poking around on my own – SB-10276 indicates a problem with loose wiring in the Saturn Astra that could cause the horn to periodically not function properly). I am horrified I’ve had to shell out as much money as I have for a repair I most likely did not need. I am saddened that it is just this type of scenario that makes me despise dealership service centers. I can assure you, I will never set foot there again.
The exception would be if 1) you arranged for me to be refunded the money I have spent that I clearly did not need to spend because nothing has been fixed, and 2) you promised me the problem WOULD BE FIXED PERMANENTLY.
I recommend that you train your service staff to be more thorough and to care more about the safety of your customers.
Sincerely,
THIS BITCH (no, I signed my real name)
Posted by Heather on May 7, 2014
https://hormonesonparade.wordpress.com/2014/05/07/quirk-can-kiss-my-dimpled-white-ass/